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Toilet Paper Loses to Canned Goods – Funny Guest Post From Adulting Blog

Sep 21, 2011

Kelly Williams Brown recently posted a funny infographic on her about how you always need toilet paper, so you might as well buy in bulk. We featured it in our post, Proof that Buying Toilet Paper in Bulk is Better.
We loved how her use of visuals make her hilarious points even more funny, so  we asked her to guest post on our blog! Kelly writes the Adulting blog, which chronicles the step-by-step process of becoming an adult (Step One: Make your fricken bed.)

Toilet Paper Faceoff

After I posted about the ongoing necessity of toilet paper on my blog, it got me thinking about life’s other durable goods and how they stack up. There was but one way to settle this, and that is an NCAA March Madness™-style bracket. I do not have time to think up 64 things, so it was a relatively small tournament. But still! These you-may-as-well-buy-a-bunch-because-you-will-eventually-use-them goods waged a fierce battle for my heart and mind.

Round One: No. 1 seeded Toilet paper easily knocked eighth-seed Staples out of the contention, because no one goes out in a snowstorm for staples. In the round’s only upset, Dish Soap (7) edged out Lightbulbs (2), because it’s better to be in the dark than have food poisoning from improperly cleaned dishes.

Canned goods (full team title: Pinto Beans and Other Canned Goods That Can Be Eaten After The Apocalypse) beat Chapstick (6). Even though having dry lips is really and truly awful, it does not compare to having no food, even if it’s just humble Pinto Beans. Fourth-seed Underwear ultimately prevailed over Q-Tips (5), mainly because I know it’s laundry time when I run out of underwear, whereas Q-Tips have no such pull on my actions.

SEMI-FINALS: Toilet Paper knocked out Dish Soap based on the fact that I’ve never bought more than one thing of dish soap at a time, and that just seems weird, while Canned Goods earned a very slight victory over Underwear, on account of that whole eating-is-necessary thing.

CHAMPIONSHIP: Toilet paper and canned goods clashed mightily, and each held the lead (in my mind, where this tournament is happening) for good stretches. On an emotional level, I prefer toilet paper. But ultimately, the Red Cross doesn’t recommend you have toilet paper in your emergency kit, and no one ever has toilet paper drives (*editor’s note – ToiletPaperWorld recently donated to a toilet paper drive, featured on Daytime TV), or gives you $2 off admission to an event with donation of two toilet paper rolls. CANNED GOODS WIN!

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8 Responses to “Toilet Paper Loses to Canned Goods – Funny Guest Post From Adulting Blog”

  1. Jessica - September 21st, 2011 at 10:14 am

    I never use my canned goods, especially if I had pinto beans. I go through toilet paper like water though!

  2. Filipino Auto Lease Broker Los Angeles - September 21st, 2011 at 3:28 pm

    I am so amused by this little contest, it almost looks like a tournament! I think every house is different, though – I’m with Jessica, I don’t really use my canned goods that much but I feel like my family could buy toilet paper by the truckload!

  3. Kayla @ Furniture Stores Los Angeles - September 22nd, 2011 at 11:15 am

    How funny, I’d totally think that TP would win over canned goods… But it makes sense, I guess, because you can’t eat toilet paper! 😉


  4. Los Angeles SEO - October 6th, 2011 at 11:36 am

    TP is definitely a necessity, but I’ve tried to eat it and it doesn’t taste that good…plus it’s hard to cook. 😉


  5. Molly - October 11th, 2011 at 5:55 am

    Oh my! Although, I think they tie in my book. When I was preparing for Hurricane Irene, I mostly stocked up on tuna and toilet paper.

  6. Allen Cutler - May 3rd, 2012 at 1:43 pm

    Canned goods was the winner huh? Didn’t call that one!

  7. Jennifer - June 19th, 2013 at 7:15 am

    Amaze, fantastic site shape! The time have you been writing a blog with regard to? you will be making writing a blog glance straightforward. The complete peek of one’s web site is wonderful, plus the articles!

  8. Sexy Lingerie - April 9th, 2014 at 6:45 am

    This is crazy, but hilarious, an entire blog on toilet paper.

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